Kristie Macdonald Relationship Article

January 2008 Issue --> Relationship Article

Hobbies for Couples: How to End Solo Sport Resentment & Create a Lifetime Bond at the Same Time

By: Kristie Macdonald

One of the best ways to strengthen love is through friendship. And one of the best ways to build friendship is through good old-fashioned play.

Now, of course, this may require some cozy conversation over a good glass of Chardonnay to remember what good old-fashioned fun was really like. But well worth the effort, according to a recent study that showed a strong correlation between love and play.

Couples who bonded through shared recreational activities rated their relationship satisfaction significantly higher than couples who did not make the time to keep their feelings of being "best friends" alive. Furthermore, the study also revealed that this bond of friendship helped couples weather both everyday stresses as well as unexpected life changing events with greater resiliency and less conflict.

How to Become "Best Friends" and "Lovers"

Looking back, I now realize that one of the smartest things my husband ever did in our relationship was getting me involved in his hobbies. Fortunately, this occurred after he converted his love of drag racing into a safer expression of the sport - RC (radio-controlled nitro racing).

So now instead of squabbling over how much he's spending on his hobby, I'm behind him 100 percent because "racing" is no longer something he goes off and does by himself. We do it together, because I like it, too!

And although RC may not fit the bill for every couple, it's a great example of reframing the experience of a solo sport that otherwise would commonly cause resentment in a relationship. Ever heard the expression "golf widow"?

3 Top Tips to Reframing the Solo Sport Experience to Keep Your Relationship Growing Strong

1. Make it a "no scoreboard zone." -- I'm sure there are myriad permutations and computations that a couple could come up with so they could pursue a hobby or sport together. And it doesn't matter whether you're good at it or not. The objective of playing together is to just have fun.

2. Create an evening where you make a game out of talking about some of your favorite childhood activities. Take turns describing how excited you felt every time you had a chance to play. Now see if you can come up with an adult version that expresses similar qualities. If nothing strikes you, let loose and play "let's pretend" and make up an activity of your own.

3. Create an exciting atmosphere that allows you to relive your childhood memories. RC is our thing because I enjoy watching the excitement on my husband's face. It's endearing to see "the child" in the person you love. And most importantly, RC let's me get closer to my husband. Being inside the same world together creates a camaraderie that isn't possible when you just go out to the movies.

While it is easy for the demands of daily living to take precedence over one's marriage or relationship, it is important for couples to communicate with each other and to jointly determine ways to strengthen their marriage.

One way to strengthen your bond is to end solo sport resentment. Activity ideas for spending quality time with your spouse are only limited by your own imagination. Just do things that you and your spouse will enjoy doing together. Just have fun being together!

About the Author:

Through the sport of RC, Kristie McDonald created a lifetime bond with her husband and her children. Now, she provides radio-controlled cars, trucks and helicopters to couples and families who want to end solo sport resentment with an exciting, trendy activity that will take you back to your childhood days. Go to: www.Nitro-Toyz.com/familytime.html to learn more about the sport of RC and get Kristie's latest FREE report, Making "Fun Time" with Radio Control

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Hobbies for Couples: How to End Solo Sport Resentment & Create a Lifetime Bond at the Same Time by Kristie Macdonald

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